Surf Board
by Andrew-Squee
Summary: Greg comes to work in some crazy stuff... flufffic. One more chapter added... even though i swore I wouldn't
1. it starts

Surf Board Disclaimer: I do not own CSI, Men in Black, The X-Files or The Village A/N: Greg's still in the lab, Graveyard's still together 

Hawaiian shirt. Cut off khakis. Blue striped surfboard. Spiked hair. Sunglasses.

"Greg, what are you doing?" Grissom asked. "This isn't casual Friday."

"Never said it was." Greg replied.

"Then why are you carrying a surf board, wearing shorts, and a Hawaiian shirt?" Grissom questioned.

"I'm going to the beach later."

"You aren't in California anymore!"

-Later-

"Greg, that's not proper work attire." Ecklie remarked.

"Your point?" Greg asked.

"Are you trying to get fired?"

"Maybe."

"Greg, this is a warning. Pull another stunt like this, and I will see that you're fired."

"I'll keep that in mind."

-Next day-

Black suit. Sunglasses. Silver cylinder.

"Greg!! What are you suppose to be?" Grissom asked.

"Agent B." Greg replied.

"Agent B."

"Yes."

"Are you trying to be an FBI agent?"

"No."

"Then why are you acting like this?"

"I was bored."

-Later-

"Well, I can't say that this is outrageous, but I do request that you stop pretending to erase people's minds." Ecklie said.

"I'm not pretending. Go ahead and ask Sarah what happened five minutes ago." Greg told him.

"I heard my name!" Sarah said.

"Sarah, what happened five minutes ago?" Ecklie asked.

"I have no idea." She replied.

"See?" Greg questioned.

"Graveyard." Ecklie muttered.

-next day-

Red cloak. Spikes. Hog head. Claws.

"GREG!! YOU ARE NOT M. NIGHT SHYAMALAN!" Grissom yelled.

"Of course not." Nick said. "That's 'those we do not speak of,' duh."

"Don't encourage him." Grissom said.

"I wasn't trying to. I was correcting your error." Nick replied.

"Did you actually see that movie?" Grissom asked.

"Nope. Mulder told me about it." Nick replied.

"Who?" Grissom asked.

"I was being sarcastic." Nick replied.

-Later-

"All right, Sanders, that's it. This has gone on long enough. Take off the stupid costume." Ecklie ordered. "It's not scary."

"I'm not wearing any costume." Greg said.

Ecklie slowly turned around, and then glanced back at the red-cloaked monstrosity. "If you're there, then who's in suit?"

Greg looked at the suit and shrugged. "No clue."

Ecklie turned two shades paler. "I just remembered I have something important to do."

After he was gone, the mask was stripped away.

"Man, was that suit hot!" Warrick exclaimed.


	2. Super!

Surf Board

Disclaimer: I do not own: CSI, Ice, Ice Baby, Superman, Batman, Spiderman, M & M Mars, or Darth Vader.

Two sizes too big baggy jeans. Lots of bling. Backwards, sideways baseball cap. Doo-rag.

"Yo, Eminem, um, don't you have a job to get too?" Warrick asked.

"Word up home skillet… I'm not Eminem!" Greg replied.

"No, he's actually a bad reincarnation of Vanilla Ice." Grissom commented.

"I thought Vanilla Ice was still alive." Greg said.

"He was on the Surreal Life. He's still alive." Warrick told them.

"Well, then, ice, ice baby!" Greg exclaimed.

"And keep on truckin.'" Grissom muttered.

-later-

"Sanders, that is not proper attire for a member of the Las Vegas crime lab." Ecklie said.

"I'm wearing a lab coat, dawg." Greg replied.

"I'm not quite sure I understand where you're coming from with the ebonics, but if this doesn't stop, I will have your job, understand?" Ecklie threatened.

"Two things, homie, one, you wouldn't want my job and two, 'Yo VIP let's kick it  
Ice ice baby…. Ice ice baby. All right stop collaborate and listen  
Ice is back with my brand new invention   
Something grabs a hold of me tightly  
Flow like a harpoon daily and nightly  
Will it ever stop yo I don't know  
Turn off the lights and I'll glow  
To the extreme I rock a mic like a vandal  
Light up a stage and wax a chump like a candle  
Dance go rush to the speaker that booms  
I'm killing your brain like a poisonous mushroom  
Deadly when I play a dope melody  
Anything less than the best is a felony  
Love it or leave it you better gain weight   
You better hit bull's eye the kid don't play  
If there was a problem yo I'll solve it  
Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it" Greg rapped.

Ecklie's mouth hung open for a minute before he snapped, "You WILL be fired by the end of this week, I promise!"

"If not, g unit, you are getting' down with your inner child and dressin' up all nice like." Greg replied.

Ecklie scoffed. "Sure, why not."

next day –

Black cape. Yellow utility belt. Black shirt, pants. Pointed ears and a mask.

"Would somebody please put the bat signal over the lab?" Grissom asked.

Greg gave him a thumbs up.

"Jumping Jellybeans, Batman!" Catherine exclaimed.

"Oh please." Sarah rolled her eyes. "It's just Greg being Greg."

"You're just jealous he erased your mind." Catherine retorted.

"What?" Sarah asked. "He erased my mind?!"

later –

"You're bound to get fired soon, Sanders." Ecklie remarked.

"One, you aren't suppose to know my secret identity. Two, I am not going to lose my job over this." Greg replied.

Ecklie rolled his eyes. " I thought your secret idenity was Bruse Watne."

"Actually, it's Lex Luther."

"That was Superman's nemesis."

"Oh, then I suppose you're the Joker."

"Yeah, right. I don't joke, Sanders."

"Stupid stiff… show up on Doc Robbins' table." Greg muttered as Ecklie was headed out the door.

next day –

Blue body length tights. Red cape. Giant 'S' in an upside-down triangle.

"If you don't get into that lab, I will lock you in a lead box with kryptonite." Grissom threatened.

"That's cruel and unusual punishment!" Greg exclaimed.

"Yeah, well, I'm such a cruel dictator. And there's a triple homicide that I need DNA run for." Grissom replied.

- later –

"You're still HERE?!" Ecklie questioned.

"Yup." Greg nodded. "So, Mr. Luther, just crawl back into your hole and continue plotting against me."

"You can count on it, Sanders. You can count on it."

next day –

Red unibody tights with black wed-like lines. Matching mask.

"Hey, Spidey, W.D. Lord and J.R. Stevenson would like you to scurry on over to the lab and finish processing that DNA." Grissom remarked.

"You would think that spiderman would want nothing to do with DNA. After all, it was a mutant spider that-" Nick began.

Warrick interrupted. "The spider was radioactive. It wasn't a mutant. You're thinking X-Men."

"No. I think that I would know what I was thinking." NNick argued.

"The spider was radioactive. You're wrong, Nick." Grissom commented.

"Lot of help you are, Mr. Corwin." Nick grumbled.

"Jeff Corwin isn't an entomologist!" Grissom protested.

"Whatever!" Nick exclaimed.

later –

"Sanders, how long has this gone on for?" Ecklie asked. "You know that tights aren't part of the dresscode."

Greg shrugged. "'Bout a week. Jealousy is not a very good personality trait, Ecklie."

"Tomorrow Sanders, tomorrow. You will be fired by then."

next day –

All black suit with gears and gages on it. Black mask. Heavy breathing.

"Luke ain't here Mr. Vader, sir." Nick commented.

"Yeah, and the Death Star is over in Washington." Warrick added.

"Besides, do you really think that you can work in that?" Nick asked.

Vader nodded.

later –

"Sanders! You moved on to villains!" Ecklie exclaimed.

"I suppose." Greg said from the door way. Heavy breathing continued from the Darth Vader at the desk. "But, see, it's just so darn hard to wear that mask all day. It gets heavy. Besides, there are no tights to show off my nice butt."

Ecklie glanced at the door way where Greg was. "I bet it's Nick or Warrick." He scoffed.

"Nick and Warrick are both over at the station. Had an interrogation for that triple homicide." Greg replied.

"Then, then, who's in the suit?" Ecklie asked.

"I dunno." Greg shrugged.

Ecklie glanced back at the suit, then at Greg, and walked at a pace faster than the average man.

Darth Vader's mask came off and Grissom remarked, "That really is miserable in there."

"Yup." Greg agreed. "Now, to go find Ecklie…"

next day –

Orange circle. White 'M.' Conrad Ecklie.

"Man, you're an M & M!" Nick remarked.

"Well, I guess he couldn't get any S & M, so he went for the next best thing." Grissom commented.

"I will have all of your jobs for this!" Ecklie threatened.

later –

"See, Ecklie, you just can't pull it off as well as I can." Greg stated.

"Sanders, I would stay out of my way for a LONG time. You _will_ pay for this!" Ecklie threatened.


	3. Etc

Surf Board

Fluff Chapter Three

Disclaimer: I do not own… UPS, CSI, X-Men (again! The cartoon version), Yu-Gi-Oh, Lucky Charms, Fed-Ex/Kinkos (maybe they'll give me some free copies…) or Starbucks.

Brown Slacks. Brown Shirt. Package.

"Sign here, please." Greg requested, handing Grissom a clipboard.

"What can brown do for me?" Grissom mused.

"Well… unlike Fed-Ex Kinkos, we just mail and deliver packages." Greg answered.

"So, if I wanted a male stripper for my next birthday…" Catherine began. "You could deliver?"

"That's what I said!" Greg agreed.

"Please don't encourage him!" Grissom exclaimed. "We're already entering the third week of these antics!"

"What antics?" Greg questioned. "Well, I'm off to make some more deliveries, thanks again for signing for that…"

"But I didn't…" Grissom said.

Later-

"I see you went out and applied for another job, Sanders." Ecklie quipped.

"Why would I do that?" Greg asked. "Sign here." He handed Ecklie the clipboard.

"Because you're going to get fired." Ecklie replied.

"Look, do you want this or not?" Greg inquired. "Cause SOMEBODY has to pay the postage."

"Want what?" Ecklie questioned.

"Your package, duh." Greg answered, holding up a small, rectangular box.

"Sanders…" Ecklie sighed. "I just don't know what to do with you anymore."

"Sign for the package." Greg whispered. "That'll help."

next day-

Yellow body suit with blue stripes. Yellow and blue mask. Retractable claws.

"You should really tell people what your planning on doing ahead of time." Grissom stated.

"Then it wouldn't be as good." Greg replied.

"Um, I think Professor X went thatta way…" Nick said.

"Thanks… have you seen Storm anywhere?" Greg questioned.

"Nope, sorry." Nick shook his head.

later-

"Darn claws!" Greg mumbled. "Can't… open…. Stupid petri dish!"

"Sanders!" Ecklie exclaimed. "What do you think you're doing?"

"I am _not_ Greg Sanders." Greg stated.

Ecklie rolled his eyes. "Fine, then… _Wolverine, _what do you think you're doing?"

"Working." Greg answered.

"With your claws out?" Ecklie questioned.

"Yup…" Greg replied, still struggling with the petri dish.

"I thought you were working at UPS…" Ecklie mused.

"They don't hire mutants. It's profiling, but they can get away with it." Greg responded.

Ecklie stared at him. "…What are you talking about!"

"The government stance on mutants is that they don't exist." Greg explained.

"I thought that was aliens…" Ecklie murmured.

"Them, too." Greg agreed. "Aha! I have conquered you, you villainous petri dish!"

Ecklie slowly back away until he was safely in the hallway.

next day-

Yellow and Red spiked hair. Blue suit/clothes things. Dark Magician hovering silently behind.

"Grissom, what's the lab's stance on balloons?" Sara asked.

"Uh… I don't know." Grissom replied, staring as Greg walked past.

"Um…well…okay…" Sara said.

"Greg, don't you think that-" Grissom began.

"I PLACE SCAPEGOAT IN DEFENSE MODE!" Greg yelled.

"Scapegoat?" Sara asked. "What good will _that_ do!"

"Don't doubt the power of the scapegoat, Mia." Greg warned.

"Mia! My name is Sara!" She exclaimed.

later-

"Who are you suppose to be?" Ecklie asked.

"Kaiba, how many times are you going to try and beat me? You've got to trust the heart of the cards." Greg replied.

"One, that doesn't answer my question. Two, my name isn't Kaiba." Ecklie stated.

"While you're talking about questions, how come your trench coat still bellows out behind you even when there's no wind?" Greg asked.

"I'm not wearing a coat." Ecklie said. "I don't own a trench coat. Sanders, I think you've gone off your rocker."

"I don't have a rocker." Greg replied. "So I couldn't have gone off it."

Ecklie rolled his eyes.

"Just for that, I'm placing Dark Magician in attack mode." Greg stated.

"The balloon behind you?" Ecklie asked. "Oh yeah, I'm _real_ scared of that thing."

"You should be." Greg replied.

next day-

Green shorts. Green coat. Green shoes. Green hat with a shamrock on top. Red hair.

"St. Patrick's day isn't for awhile…" Grissom said. "Neither is Halloween."

"Catch me lucky charms, they're magically delicious!" Greg replied.

"Lindsay loves those things." Catherine stated. "They'll rot your teeth."

"What things?" Grissom asked.

"Oh! It's Lucky!" Warrick exclaimed.

"Lucky Charms." Catherine answered.

"You know, hearts, stars, horseshoes, clovers and blue moons, pots of golden rainbows, and me red balloons!" Warrick sang.

"Is it a game?" Grissom asked.

"It's a cereal." Catherine explained.

later-

"Sanders!" Ecklie yelled. "WHAT ARE YOU WEARING!"

"…clothes…" Greg sheepishly replied.

"I know that!" Ecklie exclaimed. "But what _type_ of clothes?"

"The clothes I always wear…" Greg answered in a "like-duh" tone.

"This isn't funny." Ecklie fumed.

"Oh no!" Greg gasped. "He's trying to get me lucky charms!"

"I am not trying to get anything but you fired!" Ecklie stated.

"Liar." Greg replied.

"Am not." Argued Ecklie.

"Are too." Responded Greg.

"Am not."

"Are…too…"

"I AM NOT!"

"You am not."

"I AM!"

Greg stuck his tongue out at Ecklie and blew a raspberry.

"Wait… hold on… that's not what I meant!"


	4. the grand finale

Surf Board

Disclaimer: I don't own… um… CSI… or…um… Piglet… or… Sponge Bob… yeah…

A/N: Unless Massive Pleas of Continuation are heard, this is the last chapter. So I hope you enjoy. Sorry it took so long.

Brown Football. Football helmet. Football pads, jersey, pants, cleats… Number 87.

"I believe that makes you a wide receiver." Sarah remarked.

Greg shrugged.

"So, did you go with tape or gloves?" Warrick asked.

Greg grunted in response.

"I see you're going with the correct vocabulary for your new profession. Just don't let it affect your work." Grissom warned.

Greg merely grunted.

-later-

"Oh come on!" Ecklie exclaimed. "This is just ridiculous! _When_ are they firing you!"

Greg mumbled.

"What?" Ecklie asked.

More mumbling.

"I can't believe this!" Ecklie stormed out of the lab.

-next day-

Pink ears. Pink stripes. Pink snout.

"…Oh…my…word…" Catherine's mouth dropped. "If only Lindsay were here! You're just adorable!"

"Th-Th-Thank y-you." Greg replied, meekly.

"I'll inform everyone that there is to be nothing too scary in the lab today." Grissom said, rolling his eyes.

"Gil!" Catherine scolded, "That's mean!"

-later-

"And what, exactly, are you suppose to be?" Ecklie asked.

"W-Why I'm Pu-Pu-Pu-Piglet." Greg answered. "W-Who are you?"

Ecklie raised an eyebrow. "I am amazed at how much crap they let you get away with!"

Greg shrugged.

-next day-

White Sheet. Eye holes.

"You're kidding." Nick stated.

"This has to be the most elementary stunt that you've pulled." Sarah added.

"What do you have to say for yourself?" Nick asked.

The "ghost" stared at them.

"Well?" Sarah questioned.

"Boo!" The ghost exclaimed.

Nick and Sarah stared at him.

"BOO!" The ghost yelled.

"Ahh." Nick deadpanned, then pretended to run away, Baywatch Style.

"That is the worst run ever!" Sarah proclaimed, following him.

-later-

"You don't scare me." Ecklie remarked.

The ghost turned to face him.

"Boo?" It asked, cocking its head.

"No." Responded Ecklie.

"BOO!" The ghost yelled.

"Not scared."

"BOO!"

"Nope."

"BOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO!"

"Still not."

"BOO!"

"Nope."

"They aren't firing me."

"AH!" Ecklie exclaimed, and ran away.

-next day-

Yellow Sponge. Square Pants. Large Snail with giant eyes. Brown Shoes. Krusty Krab Employee hat.

"Meet Gary!" Greg exclaimed.

"The snail?" Grissom asked.

"Yes! Gary is my pet snail!" Greg replied.

"You know that pets aren't supposed to be here."

"…but he'll be real quiet…"

"That's not the point, Greg."

"Spongebob."

Grissom rolled his eyes. "Joe Bob, Larry Bob, Curly Bob, Moe Bob, whatever your name is, get to work."

"Okay Mr. Crabs!"

-later-

"No hats." Ecklie stated.

Greg gasped. "But this hat is part of the Krusty Krab, home of the delicious, one-of-a-kind Krabby Patty, employee uniform!"

"No…hats…"

"Plankton, you can't get me to tale of this hat!"

"My name isn't Plankton, Sanders."

"Squarepants. The name is Spongebob Squarepants."

"What?" Sarah asked, popping her head into the lab as she was walking by.

"Hey Sandy!" Greg greeted.

Sarah rolled her eyes and continued walking.

"What's going on in here?" Nick asked, walking into the lab.

"Squidward! How are you?" Greg questioned.

"Oh no." Nick groaned, and turned back around. "You two have fun."

"Sanders…" Ecklie began.

"Plankton, it's me, Spongebob!" Greg corrected.

"Spongebob?" Warrick asked.

"Patrick!" Greg exclaimed.

"Oh no! You aren't bringing me into your little twisted fantasy world!" Warrick left as quickly as possible.

"Did you hit your head this morning?" Ecklie asked.

"Nope!" Greg exclaimed.

Ecklie sighed. "I give up! You win, Sanders! I'm going to stop trying to fire you!" He stormed off.

-end-


	5. International

A/N: This is the last chapter… I swear.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything… (and by anything I mean Steve Urkel, Pirates of the Caribbean, and England)

--

Huge glasses. Collared Shirt. Suspenders. Pants pulled way above the waist.

"Hi guys!" Greg exclaimed in a high squeaky voice.

Warrick stared at him. "You're a little too pale…"

Greg glanced down at himself and gave an awkward shrug. Turning around, he hit Sarah's coffee mug and poured it over her shirt. "Did I do that?" He asked.

Sarah glared at him.

Greg snorted a laugh in reply and continued walking to the lab.

later –

Ecklie stared at Greg. "…I don't get it…"

Greg knocked a Petri dish on the floor. "Oops… Did I do that?" He asked again.

Ecklie stared at him. "I still don't get it…"

Grissiom walked into the lab, stared at Greg from above his glasses, then looked at Ecklie. "The proverbial nerd stereotype."

Ecklie returned Grissiom's stare. "_I don't get it._"

Greg laughed, snorting until he was almost coughing.

Grissiom rolled his eyes and walked out of the lab.

Greg bumped into the table and jostled a VERY EXPENSIVE MACHINE. "Did I do that?" He asked again, looking puzzled.

Ecklie sighed, and started to leave. "I'll never understand you, Sanders."

"_Steve_." Greg corrected.

- next day -

Plastic sword. Dreadlocks with one strand of beads. Pirate-y garb. Three cornered hat.

"Should I swoon with admiration?" Catherine asked.

"Aye, for it's Captain Jack Sparrow that ye be dealing with." Greg replied.

"Who?" Grissiom asked.

"Captain Jack Sparrow." Greg answered.

"Is this some pop culture figure that I should know?" Grissiom questioned.

Catherine laughed. "Either some pop culture figure or someone teeny boppers have a crush on."

"Now, to commandeer that Chevy Tahoe…" Greg plotted, staggering down the hallway, singing "A Pirate's Life for Me."

later –

"I'm pretty sure that you aren't allowed to be drunk on the job…" Ecklie said.

"Aye, Matey. And what job might that be?" Greg asked.

"The one that pays you." Ecklie replied.

"You know what would pay…" Greg said, sliding closer to Ecklie. "_Finding Davey Jones' Locker._"

"There is no employee here by the name of Davey Jones."

"Well, that's the rub, isn't it."

"Are you high?"

"Well, now, that's a rather nasty accusation, don't you think?" Greg pulled out a compass, and peered out past Ecklie.

"Heading North?" Ecklie asked.

"Eh…" Greg shrugged, closed the compass, and staggered forward. He pulled out an old fashioned pistol.

"Whoa! Last I checked, you weren't certified to carry a gun, Sanders!" Ecklie exclaimed.

"This bullet isn't meant for you, matey." Greg replied.

"Uh huh…." Ecklie slowly backed away from Greg. "I'm gonna go get a nice white jacket for you, and a lovely padded room to go with it…"

next day –

Large black cylindrical fluffy hat with chinstrap. Red jacket with buttons. Black pants.

Greg marched into the break room.

"Hey, Warrick. I bet I can make him smile first." Nick stated.

Warrick glanced up from his coffee. "You… are… so… on…"

Nick walked out of the break room and came back with reindeer antlers on his head. Greg just stared at him. "Huh…" Nick said. "I thought that would work."

As Greg marched out of the break room and Nick walked out, Warrick fell on the floor in a fit of laughter.

later –

Ecklie stared at Greg. "Well… it's a bit robotic, but at least you're being professional."

Greg didn't reply.

Warrick walked in with one of Catherine's shirts on and a shining red nose.

Greg kept working.

Nick walked up behind Warrick with a fire extinguisher in his hand, and unleashed it on Warrick.

Ecklie stared on in horror, mouth agape, while Greg still kept working.

Warrick and Nick headed out of the lab, licking their ego wounds.

"This is MADNESS!" Ecklie exclaimed.

Greg kept working.

Nick walked in with a sombrero on his head and a tiny guitar and began singing "On the Good Ship Lollypop."

Greg kept working.

Warrick walked in with a video camera and began recording Nick,

Greg kept working.

Ecklie shook his head and walked away.


	6. foodstuffs

A/N: Okay. First and foremost, thank you for all the reviews. The CSI fanfic readership is truly one that likes their Greg fics… and I know that I keep saying that I've written my last chapter of this darn fic… but seriously. I'm running out of ideas. So… I know someone (alleycatabra) mentioned Harry Potter and a chicken suit… so in honor of that last suggestion… I present to you…

A DISCLAIMER! I do not own CSI. Or Oscar Mayer. Or McDonald's. Or Oreo.

--

Large cylindrical curve. Bread Wrap around. Hotdog suit.

Nick cleared his throat. "So… I know that I am the infamous YouTube CSI, but _still_. This is ridiculous."

"You know what we should have done?" Warrick asked. "Taken a picture of each of these costumes and put them together in a slide show."

"Like those 'Tom the MySpace nerd takes a picture of himself every day for four years' movies." Nick replied.

"Look, just because you guys wish you were an Oscar Mayer wiener, doesn't mean you need to hate." Greg huffed, crossing his arms as much as a giant hot dog could.

"Only if you sing the song." Warrick teasingly answered.

Greg took a deep breath. "Oh, I wish I were an Oscar-Mayer wiener; that is what I'd truly like to be. Cause if I were an Oscar-Mayer wiener, everyone would be in love with me." He sang, voice warbling on the last few notes.

Nick and Warrick were on the floor laughing as Greg huffed his way to the lab.

later –

"Compensating for something?" Ecklie asked, smirking.

"Only if you're looking in a mirror." Greg quipped in reply.

"Haha" Ecklie sneered, pulling out a digital camera. "I'm willing to bet that, in a few years, you won't find this as amusing as you do now."

Greg shrugged, and pulled something out from one of the cabinets in the lab.

As Ecklie snapped the picture, Greg put on a Richard Nixon mask. Waving two peace signs, as was characteristic for Nixon, Greg broke out in song once more. "My baloney has a first name, it's C-O-N-A-R-D. My baloney has a second name, it's E-C-K-L-I-E. I love to torture him everyday, if you ask me while I'll saaaaaay… cause Conrad Ecklie has a way with B-O-L-O-G-N-A!"

Ecklie stormed out of the lab, throwing his camera into the trashcan.

next day –

Red curly hair. White face make up. Red and yellow suit. Giant red, uh, clown shoes.

"Mmmm Mmmm good." Catherine said, grinning.

Sarah gagged. "Veg-e-tar-i-an."

Greg just shrugged. "Would you like to make a donation to the Ronald McDonald House?" He asked.

"Aww, charity work! That's so cute!" Catherine said, pinching Greg's chin and walking out of the lab.

Sarah continued to gag.

later –

Ecklie glared at Greg. "At least this time you're dressed like you're acting."

Greg shrugged, made a suggestive move, and replied with "Over a billion served."

Sarah walked by, making an overly dramatic gagging face.

"HAMBURGERS!" Ecklie yelled.

"Hamburgers, women…" Greg shrugged.

"You can't tell me that Ronald McDonald gets that much action!" Ecklie exclaimed.

"At least you got my name right this time…" Greg muttered, turning towards a microscope.

next day –

Black circle. White circular middle. Glass of milk in hand.

Grissom chocked on his coffee.

"What?" Greg asked.

"Um… ice cold milk and an Oreo cookie…" Grissom chocked out.

"They go together like a classic combination!" Greg exclaimed, dipping his finger into the milk and swirling it around.

Grissom groaned. "You realize these are getting more sexual, right?"

Greg paused. "Hmmm…"

"That's because he doesn't like it when women eat him!" Nick chipped in.

Grissom rolled his eyes.

later –

"Huh. And here I thought that you were on 'Uh-oh Oreo.'" Ecklie remarked, chuckling at his own joke.

Greg stared at him. "Well, since I'm not, Warrick must be the 'Uh-oh Oreo.'"

Ecklie sighed. "You know, Sanders, this is getting old. You can't possibly be doing this for your own enjoyment. What bet did you lose?"

Greg snickered. "I'm not the one who lost a bet…"

next day –

Yellow feathers. Red beak. Three pronged feet. Bwgwak!

Sarah stared. Just. Stared. "I'm so glad that I gave up meat." She groaned.

"Why?" Grissom asked.

Sarah pointed, and Grissom's eyes followed her finger.

"Huh." He said. "Good thing that there's no major football games about to come on, because then we might have to make our own chicken wings."

Sarah paled.

"BWGWAK!" The chicken squawked.

later –

Ecklie walked into the lab. "Why do I torture myself?!" He asked. "Why?!"

"Bwgwak?" The chicken asked.

"What, are you too _chicken_ to show your face today?" Ecklie asked, grinning at his little joke (Even the big bad boss has a sense of humor).

"Bwgwak." The chicken shook its head.

"Well, that depends." Greg said.

"On?" Ecklie asked.

"On whom you're talking to." Greg replied.

Ecklie turned around. "If you're out here, and Grissom and Sarah are in the break room, and Warrick has the night off, and Catherine's in with Hodges, then _who_ is in the chicken suit?" Ecklie asked.

Greg shrugged. "You'd have to ask the chicken."

Ecklie began banging his forehead against the doorway of the lab. "_Whywhywhywhywhywhywhy?!_" He stopped abruptly, and walked away.

Greg tsked. "He really should remember everyone on Graveyard."

The chicken cocked its head sideways at him.

"Come on, Nick. I know it's you." Greg stated.

"Know it's who, now?" Nick asked, walking past the lab.

Greg stared at Nick. "If you're here, then who…" He walked over to the chicken, and pulled off the head, then nearly fainted.

"Well, I am the 'Uh-oh Oreo.'" Warrick laughed, as Greg had to find a seat.

"And the chicken…" Greg whispered.


End file.
